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From: JHUVMS::ORACLE "RELEASE THE WEASEL" 1-SEP-1990 15:26:34.92
To: MEGADUDE
Subj: Nylevia is in New Jersey

And now for a brief run-down of some pre-Max history of the Significants.

After their first encounter w. Bloodscar ("The Bath-house Massacre"), the Significants were tested by the thieves' guild The Underground, and they were told to steal the magical Ginsu sword. After Oethnar K.O.'ed a butler (no kidding!) the group succeeded. The next morning, tho, the sword was gone + the search was on. They learned the Ginsu was forged by the legendary weaponsmith Johhn (no one knows why 2 H's), and traced it to the castle of the evil mage Ignus. It was here they first met Margrethe. Ignus used the Ginsu to summon the fire elemental Mirronkail. Ignus was killed by Sunfighter, and tho the elemental was freed, Margrethe banished him.

Sometime later, when en route to Nepporis, the group came to the mountain keep of the really powerful + nigh-immortal mage Arturian (who had been Johhn, amongst others). It was here that Signet accidently released a demon which killed Flintfoot. Arturian seemed rather blase about mortal matters at the time. [As really powerful mages tend to be.]

Shortly after the end of the Demon Wars, Arturian began his quest to achieve godhood. Arturian summoned Mirronkail and transformed the insane (and sickly, due to radiation poisoning) warrior Kerouac into an air elemental. This brought Arturian into conflict with Kerouac's former comrades Signet T. Significant + Shilree, and their surprise allies - The Brotherhood of Gila. Seems Shilree hired the Brotherhood to kill Kerouac after she murdered one of Shil's only friends in the world. [Where she got the $$$ for this... well, it MIGHT have some small impact on our campaign so...] The outcome of this Arturian ep is unknown.

At least, that's how DM outlined a planned campaign w. Jeff, Ed, Laura, and some other NJ folks to me. I don't know exactly what happened.

Til the return to Lianth,
-- Weasel/Oracle/Library Guy/Eternal Cynic/The Angry Bidderr

From: JHUVMS::BLAKFLAK 5-SEP-1990 12:49:00.19
To: SIGNET RHYNWA MAX KEROUAC SUNNY ARIATH
Subj: The 2nd Annual Doug's Campaign Beginning Party Thing

Yar! The summer is over, and that means it's time for this year's

BIG GALA SPECIAL ALL-STAR CAMPAIGN BEGINNING SESSION WITH NUTRASWEET!

Yes, once again you shall be transported to the strange world of Nylevia (and beyond!) to fight evil and have psychodramas! Gee, what fun! The only news that I'm authorized to release here is a tentative list of who's going to be there and as who...

Alyssa Gardner returning as RHYNWA, cleric of Death. Can she cope with
the shattering secret of the stunning change in her status quo?

Scott Borst reprising his role as MAXWELL SILVERHAMMER. What will finally
happen when he meets his father, face to face?

Ed Einhorn as PALMER KHAN, an ex-gladiator whose past is shrouded in the
dark secrets of Rimbor City.

Jonah Cohen playing SCHNEIDER, a jesterly character whose happy exterior
perhaps masks a deep and secret pain.

Laura Nagel introducing the eloquent JANTHER MORIA (sp, LN?), a fighting
man whose words bely the great difficulties he must overcome.

Also attending (but hasn't made his character yet) will be

Evan Haag, whose portrayal of Duke Faraker last year brought rave reviews
and a new political bent to the city of Lianth.

What is the job that brings these characters together? And how? They're not going to meet in a bar, are they? And where will their adventures take them? What of the old characters? Signet? Kerouac? Shilree??? Will Trill return? Will Spiffy Garbonzo ever conquer the world? Will Javert ever lighten up?

Well, maybe one or two of these questions will be answered, but I've got a whole year, so don't hold your breath.

So, be there:

Sunday, September 9th
Potluck dinner at 5
Gaming from 6 - 11

for the story we could only call...

a) Deadly Genesis
b) Baptism by Fire
c) When Titans Clash
d) If Death be My Destiny
e) A Day in Botswana, A Night in Perotsville
f) Dark Spiffy Ascendant
g) My Friend My Enemy
h) "Rhynwa! Behind you!"
i) P is For Penguin
j) All of the above

Anyone not able to attend RSVP and start counting the days you have left on earth.

The Giants opener will be being recorded, so it's no excuse.

the DougMaster

From: JHUVMS::ORACLE "RELEASE THE WEASEL" 10-SEP-1990 19:56:58.79
To: GRENDEL NITROED MEGADUDE NAGEL_LC SPIKE
Subj: A less than significant start...

... in more ways than one!

RHYNWA: Is something fucking with her relationship to Arawn yet again?
MAXWELL SILVERHAMMER: Will he ever just tell someone to piss off?
PALMER KHAN: What's the deal with him? Where did he get that funky lasso? Why is he trying to defenestrate?
LUTHIEN: Will he lighten up? What's his connection to Rhynwa?
JANTHER MORIA: Where'd he get the funky specs? And why? And what's his interest in Shilree?
SCHNEIDER: Will he ever get that fart spell to work? Will he ever be serious? And what's his interest in Shilree's kid?
KHYRISSE: Will the poor little rich elf get to do anything before she gets scorched?
JAVERT + DRED: Who's the bigger twit?
NIKITA: A beautiful female thief? Hmm...

Find out the answers to these and more questions (hopefully) next week on the campaign that's shaping up to be called:

"DALENCIA: IT'S A KILLER PLACE, BUT THEY'RE ALL FEEBS"

[Or something like that.]

From: JHUVMS::BLAKFLAK 11-SEP-1990 13:28:33.29
To: JANTHER SCHNEIDER PALMER MAX RHYNWA ARIATH
Subj: The real questions...

Well, after the first session (with its resounding, ah, not-quite-victory), I have been asked a variety of questions.

Here they are, with nice helpful little answers.

Q: Is Javert supposed to be, like, our leader or something?
A: No. Javert simply serves as envoy to the Nylevian government. He will be accompanying you on missions sometimes, but as an NPC, not a leader-type.

Q: Didn't you hit us with a whole lot of stuff to remember for one mission?
A: Well, yeah, I did. Only all the information that you get will have relevance for the entire year's worth of campaigns, not just the first "mission."

Q: Why didn't you start out with sending us against something a little easier... like maybe Bloodscar?
A: Who told you you were supposed to win, huh?

Q: I'm confused. Which plotline is the current mission focussing on?
A: Yes.

Q: Hey! How come you have NPCs lying to us about important information?
A: They do that sometimes.

Q: What exactly is our mission here, anyway?
A: That's for you to decide. This isn't some god game, you know. You guys have complete control over your destinies, and what missions occur will be decided by what you do and where you go. For instance, if you decide that the giants are behind everything, and want to go infiltrate their country, that's fine. Or if you think that the Papal Church of Tal is manipulating the guy with horns, perhaps you should investigate them. There are twice as many factions at work than you've even met, so keep digging, you'll probably find something.

Q: What happens if I'm late?
A: Let's just say that I've spent all summer thinking up evil things to do to you, and if you are late more than once or twice, your character will start to feel it. Ed. Alyssa. Jonah.

Q: Anything else?
A: No.

Tune in later for the DougMaster's preview for next week's mission...

the DougMaster

From: JHUVMS::ORACLE "RELEASE THE WEASEL" 12-SEP-1990 12:24:33.95
To: GRENDEL SPIKE NITROED NAGEL_LC MEGADUDE
Subj: The real question is...

...ok, this Hornyman fella - how the hell was he doing that?!?!?!?!?

Now, Doug-master mentioned Rhea Jones, who did have a bio-magnetic force field. That would explain why Janther, er, saw (?) Horny as bigger than we did, and why ropes can't strangle him. BUT (are ya listening DM?) it DOESN'T follow that swords etc. work just fine on him. MUCH LESS how he was able to stay rooted to a wooden floor! Even if the field protected him, the weight of that bed should have yanked him over the edge. Can you say "pre-school physics" boys n'girls?

Yours til Schneider appears on the cover of GQ,
-- Jonah/The Weasel/etc.

From: JHUVMS::BLAKFLAK 12-SEP-1990 17:17:56.25
To: JANTHER SCHNEIDER PALMER MAX RHYNWA DRAGON
Subj: The magnetic field controversy

I didn't say he >was< Rhea Jones... I just said that that might be a hint...

Besides, this is magic. Physics has nothing to do with the matter.

DougMaster

"It's worse than that, it's Physics, Jim!"
-- The Firm

From: JHUVMS::ORACLE "RELEASE THE WEASEL" 17-SEP-1990 10:07:43.69
To: GRENDEL NITROED NAGEL_LC MEGADUDE DRAGON SPIKE
Subj: Questions???

-- Will Ed ever be on time?
-- Will this party ever get a name?
-- The next time (god forbid there will be a next time) we meet up with the giant, will Max + Khyrisse team up to nail him w. a fireball (maybe combined with a grease spot)?
-- What does Bar---, er, "Magnate" want from Janther?
-- Is his real name Palmer COHEN?
-- Will Palmer ever succede with that lasso maneuver in commbat?
-- Will the entire party head for one of Sir Tomas' get-toggethers on Saturday night?
-- What will happen when Schneider encounters Sir Jovain? -- Will Alyssa bake us some more of that yummy banana breadd?
-- Will any of us ever be able to think about FEET in the ssame way?
-- Will we ever, like, maybe WIN a fight?

Stay tuned next week for another bloody episode of:

DAYS OF OUR KNIGHTS

[or something like that]

From: JHUVMS::BLAKFLAK 18-SEP-1990 13:29:23.94
To: JANTHER PALMER SCHNEIDER MAX RHYNWA ARIATH
Subj: The Third Mission: Questions answered at last!

Yar! It's GUEST STAR DAY here in DOUG'S CAMPAIGN!

Yes, the rumors are true... this weekend's mission will be guest starring a player you all know and love (if not his character...), yes, the irrepressable Jeff Hersh (whatever that's supposed to mean). Jeff will be playing a specially made NPC for this mission (now that poor ol' Shilree's gone the way of all flesh) and this mission only, that will not include any of the following exciting events! (Yes, this is a sneaky way of making sure you read all the text.)

-- Learn the secret of Shilree's baby!
-- Discover the hidden faction within the knighthood!
-- Find out who was behind the assassination attempt on Dukke Faraker!
-- Solve the mystery of the strange blue wall separating thhe countries!
-- Witness the magnificent return of Trillarillia Cararia!<
-- See Princess Nikita naked!

However, what you may actually do is more along the lines of, oh, say...

-- Get another clue or two about what might be going on.
-- Meet another annoying Jeff character.
-- Not have to deal with Algol Demonstar.
-- Deal with Lord High Justice Dred.
-- Wander aimlessly around the castle.
-- Visit the lower city.
-- Rest.

Hmm. Maybe we should go with the first batch... it somehow sounds more interesting.

Well, until Sunday, remember...

"Sometimes my arms bend back." -- Dream Laura Palmer

the DougMaster

From: JHUVMS::ORACLE "RELEASE THE WEASEL" 19-SEP-1990 15:25:57.18
To: GRENDEL NITROED NAGEL_LC MEGADUDE SPIKE DRAGON
Subj: I never thought I'd say this...

...but I actually miss Signet, in a way. Y'see, whenever we met some NPCs, they'd say "Who the hell are you?" and of course, we all know how Ed would respond. Let's face it, there's something a little lacking to "We're this group of envoys from Nylevia, this place to the south, see?" THIS PARTY NEEDS A NAME!!! Ergo, with the aid of my good friend Schneider, I have come up with a few suggestions:

The Envoys (zzz)
The Insignificants
There Might Be Giants
The Party Animals
The Servants of Jah, Mon
10,000 Maniacs
Seven Heroic Nylevian Officers Of Knighthood (commonly known by its acronym - S.H.N.O.O.K.)
Luthien & the Presbyterians
Palmer's Slipknots
Janther & the Black Cats
They Might Be Dead by the end of their next adventure
The Fun House Gang
Rhynwa's Raiders
Tenzil for the Defense
The House of Usher
ElfQuest for lotsa Bucks
Demonstar Schmemonstar!!!
MAXimum Force (I know at least 2 members who'd vote for that)
We're Tired... and we wanna go home
HopSFA
"Up Yours, Dred!"
Rhynwa & the Yephounds
My Favorite Nylevians
The Cushions
One Big Happy Family
"Cleric!!"
The Damage Sponges
Seven Nylevians and a Baby
Nikita's Nighties (?)
Expense Account
Bloodscar (might solve the self-image problem)
Get Rid Of Slimy assasinS (G.R.O.S.S.)
Bicycle Wheel
The Proctors
Bound For Glory
Bound by that Lasso
Not of Your Concern

Well, any other ideas?

Til we WIN a fight,
-- The Weasel

From: JHUVMS::BLAKFLAK 25-SEP-1990 16:46:57.84
To: MAX JANTHER PALMER ARIATH RHYNWA SCHNEIDER
Subj: More to come...

Well, now... (As Jason McGuire would say...)

It seems as though the party actually survived. Well, that's what I get for using only one shark. Live and learn. (What was that about a Tarasque, Jeff?)

Actually, congrats upon successfully finding and recovering li'l Junior. It was >not< a foregone conclusion that you would win (it never is...) Anyway, this is that handy-dandy little "and now for next week" note.

We may have a problem. (Oh, no, I hear you cry.) Yes, it's true. The rumor is currently going around that Twin Peaks is going to be a two-hour movie this (you guessed it) Sunday. Now, you know how much I bitch at you for trying to change plans around on me. Well, just to prove to you that I'm not some horrible lying hypocrite, GAMING WILL STILL BE SUNDAY FROM 6 TO 11. Repeat, there has been no change in plans, GAMING WILL STILL BE SUNDAY FROM 6 TO 11. However, at 11:01, there shall be a Twin Peaks party, location as-yet-undetermined.

Ahem. Now that the, well, business is out of the way, I'll get on to the stuff that you're interested in.

WHAT HAPPENS NEXT WEEK:

-- An important envoy arrives at Castle Edimon, but does this visit bring assistance... or difficulty?
(Odds stand 7:1 in favor of difficulty)
-- More is discovered about the mystery of the strange bluee wall.
-- The knights take off on their quest, but what are they rreally questing for?
-- And, in an unprecedented move, a character from >last yeear< shows up! Who is it? Why is he/she there? What does he/she want? And how the hell Did he/she get through the wall?

These mysteries and more may or may not be dealt with next week.

This does, of course, inspire me to open up the FIRST OF THE YEAR "Maximum Force" CONTEST, which is, very simply,

So, who do you think this character from last year will be?

1000 xp to the player or players who guess correctly. One guess per player, void where prohibited.

Also, next week's plotline will be heavily up to you. Whatever venue you decide to pursue will probably be the storyline you get involved in.

Meaning simply this: I've put the plots in place, you've got to decide which ones to pursue.

Also, hopefully next week I'll have my maps of Edimon and the passageways ready, so I'll be able to make you map. Won't that be fun.

Well, I've taken up enough disk space, so I'll end here. (Wow. I didn't think I even had that much to say about this week. Shows you my mouth.)

la DougMaster

From: JHUVMS::ORACLE "RELEASE THE WEASEL" 24-SEP-1990 12:49:18.34
To: GRENDEL NITROED NAGEL_LC MEGADUDE SPIKE DRAGON
Subj: The Name of this Band is Talking Heads...

Evening. The party was upset over the theft of the teleport device, but at least the baby was safely tucked back in the nursery. As usual, Schneider was acting as group cheerleader.

"Hey guys, at least our record is up to 1-2-1. I bet that within a few missions we'll be kicking ass left right & center!"

"Yeah, right," they collectively moaned.

"Oh, by the way. Rhynwa, the Significants were, like named after one of the party members, right?"

"Yes."

"Well, I got a thought, and before it dies of lonliness... I think we should call our party 'MAXimum Force.' It can be named after one of the coolest guys I know, it's the name of my favorite cantrip, and it makes us sound really tough. I can picture it now ---" he struck a dramatic pose "---'Halt, villains, or prepare to be met with,'" he inserted a dramatic pause and turned on the cantrip called >pump up the volume<, "'MAXIMUM FORCE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!'"

"By Arawn, why are you shouting, man?!?"

"Sorry, Ryn. I took a correspondence course from the Manga Khan School of Dramatic Dialogue."

"Uh, he's no relation, case y'all was wonderin."

"So, what do you think of the name? Cool, huh?"

"I'm very honored, Schneider," Mr. Silverhammer said, with his typical modesty.

"Sure. Why not?" Khyrisse answered.

"I guess so," Janther said, "it sure beats 'The Damage Sponges' at least."

"Ryn? Palmer? Luthien?"

Will the group win another fight?
Will Palmer ever do anything useful with that lasso?
Will Ghoul Hand Luthien get to kill some more people?
Is Khyrisse trying to be Michael Jackson or something?
What with Janthro, Lutheran, Palm-Hair(etc.), why has no one referred to the group's thief as Schnouser?
Will Gdeon survive potty training?

Stay tuned next week for the mission posterity might someday refer to as:

"MAXIMUM FORCE!!!!!!!!!!!"
or
"No rest for the weary, @#$%&*!!!"

From: JHUVMS::BLAKFLAK 25-SEP-1990 15:21:48.93
To: ORACLE MEGADUDE
Subj: Hahahahahahaha!!!!

Bwahahahahaha!

"Ghoul Hand Luth!" I laughed so hard I broke all my furniture!

"You use any magic, it's a day in the box. You try to escape, it's a day in the box..."

Bwahahahahaha!

Thank you, and good afternoon.

DougMaster

From: JHUVMS::BLAKFLAK 25-SEP-1990 16:59:03.79
To: JANTHER MAX SCHNEIDER PALMER RHYNWA ARIATH
Subj: One last thing...

One last note (i.e. I forgot to mention it in my last note)

If you want any mail about the campaign to be put in the campaign archives, when you are sending it (to whomever) also send it to Scottbo, at his account, "MEGADUDE".

'Sall.

From: JHUVMS::NITROED 26-SEP-1990 15:12:25.40
To: ORACLE MEGADUDE SNED-FACE SPIKE LAURA DRAGON
Subj: Objection, your honor

I have long resisted the temptation to write one of these messages (i.e., I've been too lazy to write out much mail), but there comes a time in every man's life when he must stand up and make his conscientious objection. My time is now. My subject is "Maximum Force". It's just lame, guys. I don't care who we name it after, I don't care who names it, but I can not stand by seeing it named "Maximum Force". Possible other names:

Seven Nylevians and a baby (my favorite of Jonah's)
Six Cool Dudes and a Schneider
Adventurers. They're Stupid.
The Wraths of Khan
Maxwell and the Hammertones
Who Shall Remain Nameless (thus, we'll be the party Who Shall Remain Nameless)
My Cherie Amours (after Janther)
Ariath's Still Dead! (okay, maybe it's not a normal name, but think of how many times we'll get to mention it)
Khryisse's Alaisons
Just These Guys, Y'know?
Death's Chewable Fingers
Near-Perfection (arrogant to others, but we know...)
Adventurers (Luth's answer to "who are you?")
Cool Dudes on a Boat
Cool Dudes off a Boat
Ghoul-hand Luth and the Chain-gang
Signet and the Significants (why quit when we're ahead?)
Ignore The Thief (Igg Nor...a cool name for thieves in general)
As If

My favorite is Who Shall Remain Nameless, but you can choose any you like...as long as it's *not* Maximum Force.

From: JHUVMS::BLAKFLAK 26-SEP-1990 15:16:18.25
To: JANTHER PALMER SCHNEIDER ARIATH RHYNWA MAX
Subj: Or...

Another of my favorites...

The Clue Phone Repairmen

Thank you for your support.

DougMaster

From: JHUVMS::SPIKE "Spike" 27-SEP-1990 13:32:43.47
To: ORACLE NITROED BLAKFLAK DRAGON NAGEL_LC MEGADUDE
Subj: name for the group

THE DEATH MAGNETS

Need we say more?

From: JHUVMS::BLAKFLAK 27-SEP-1990 16:29:56.25
To: JANTHER PALMER SCHNEIDER MAX ARIATH RHYNWA
Subj: What's in a name... a Damage Sponge by any other...

A Damage Sponge by any other name would hurt as much...

Here are a few ideas of my own to be thrown in the pot...

We Fought the Law (and Javert Won)
The Justice League of Ataniel (the Dalencian name for the world you're on)
Doug and the Slugs
Seven Characters in search of Experience
Late Night with Maxwell Silverhammer
Don't Fuck with People Who Have Been Dead
The Guardians of Truth, Justice and Shilree's kid
The Dino-Riders (oops... wrong campaign)
Gorgar the Invincible (sorry, Kris)
The New York Yankees
The Mithril Daggers
Blind Ambition
The Toolkit (hammer, scythe, rope, knife, etc.)
The Legion of Super-Nylevians
S.H.I.E.L.D. (So How Is Ed's Lateness Doing?)
People Who Are Taller Than Signet and the Significants
The Web (oops... already taken)
The Church of Jesus Christ Latter Day Saints
Adventurers in Babysitting
The Miranda Act
Rubber and You're Glue ("Who are you?" "We're Rubber and You're Glue!")
Doug's Playthings (truth in advertising)
It's In His Kiss (The Shoop Shoop Song)
Top Jimmy and the Rhythm Pigs

Ahem. I'll stop now. Thank you for your support.

If you haven't voted yet... vote now. The contest is still open!

DougMaster

From: JHUVMS::BLAKFLAK 27-SEP-1990 17:24:00.98
To: SCOTT ALYSSA NOEL JONAH STEMTWICKLE LAURA ARI
Subj: The Return of Jeffy

Hear Ye! Hear Ye!

The word is this:

Jeffy has come down from the sky and spoken to me, and yea, he did sayeth,
"My new address up here in Buffalo is V056Q3G5 and the node is UBVMS."
Thanks beith to Jeff. Amen.

Doug

From: JHUVMS::MEGADUDE 27-SEP-1990 17:32:10.59
To: MAX RHYNWA JANTHER SCHNEIDER PALMER DM
Subj: Names and a contest!

Names, names, names...

Well, of those which have gone before, I'm sort of partial to:

There Might Be Giants (topical to recent events, 'though Max really enjoyed using that "Enlarge" spell...)
Maximum Force (I would, wouldn't I? :-)
Maxwell and the Hammertones (again, I would...)
Khyrisse's A-Liasons (you gotta laugh when you say this one aloud)
The Tool Chest (my personal fave)
Adventurers in Babysitting

Then again, there's also:

Behind the Blue Door
The Innocents Abroad (or is that "Ignorants"?)
The Sewer Tourists
The Palace Intrigues
Knights and Daze
etc. etc. etc.

And now, my official entry into the first official "Maximum Force" Contest (so named simply because that's what Doug called it in the article announcing it, for want of a better term):

I'm hoping it'll be Finn Mac Finn. It makes sense; he's a wandering minstrel with a penchant for getting drunk and wandering off the trail. Doug also gave me the hint that Max was with the party when they met this character last year, so he/she appeared after January. We shall see.

Until next Sunday,

Scott AKA Maxwell Silverhammer
AKA Megadud(e)!!
AKA Great Scott!
AKA ScottBo
AKA Lame-o (???)
etc. etc. etc...

From: JHUVMS::SPIKE "Spike" 28-SEP-1990 11:49:14.54
To: MEGADUDE BLAKFLAK NITROED NAGEL_LC ORACLE DRAGON
Subj: yet more names

I LIKE the sewer tourists but I think it works better as "Sewer Tours R Us"

How 'bout the Sewercides?(heh, heh)
how about "Functional"

"hey, who are you?
"We're Functional!"

Well, anyway... I like a lot of the names that have gone by and I am willing to accept most (or at least a good few) of them, but We need a consensus AND even though Doug's opinion does not carry the same weight as the rest of us (he's only the DM) his agreement would very pleasant as well.

perfection awaits...
RHYNWA of the Silver Scythe

From: JHUVMS::NAGEL_LC 28-SEP-1990 22:35:14.94
To: MEGADUDE BLAKFLAK NITROED SPIKE ORACLE
Subj: What's in a name?

How 'bout Blindman's Bluff?

(Dougmaster?)

-- me (:

From: JHUVMS::ORACLE "RELEASE THE WEASEL" 29-SEP-1990 15:29:35.64
To: GRENDEL NAGEL_LC SPIKE MEGADUDE NITROED DRAGON
Subj: Yet another one?!?!?!?!

Well, if we REALLY wanted to change the group's image we could try:

The Leather Masters of Sin

[NOT suggested by me! HONEST!!! Its author wishes to remain anonymous. I can see why.]

Til we agree on a name, I am,
-- Schneider

Names of Native American tribes Mayans Arrows Sewanee Hopi mask