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'Does the moon look bigger to you tonight?'

The Book of Ataniel

The Corniest/Funniest Pick-Up Lines of Ataniel

The best, worst, funniest, and just plain weirdest pick-up lines in ten years on Ataniel...

Male-Female Divider

Worked!"Let's go upstairs and rub ointment in our wounds."
--Rhynwa, to Oethnar

No such luck"Does your order have a vow of chastity?"
--some babe Christian the paladin was questioning

No such luck"Waow! What are YOU doing tonight?"
--Kimmy, to Luthien after he jolted her back from death with an essence blast

No such luck"Come here, womanly woman! Hold onto the long healing rod!"
-- the Evil Dr. Zeinfeld, to Khyrisse

No such luck"TAKE me, Evil Doctor!"
--Tila, flinging her clothes off

Worked!"Now I'm really curious about this body so I want to find someone to have sex with me."
--George, to Kitty

No such luck"Hi. I'm Tila. I'm a hero."
--Tila, to some Javinese priest

Took more persuading..."I am the lord of rodly might."
--Palmer

Took more persuading..."Yeah, well at least I'm not tied to a stake."
"Yeah, well... maybe I like being tied to a stake."
--Tila and Palmer

Worked!"You know, they may hang me."
--Palmer, to Tila

No such luck"Do you sleep?"
"I bed. Come an' find out."
--Threnody and Kieran

Took more persuading..."I should let you know, all my clothes got blown up with the ship."
--Inez

Worked!"1200 memories and come keep me company tonight."
--Tila, haggling with the Death Slaad

Took more persuading..."You know, Max, when I first met you, I was a woman, and I'm a woman again."
--Threnody, to Evil Max

Took more persuading..."Could someone lend me some money? I don't have a place to sleep tonight."
--Threnody

Took more persuading..."You're just not catching the pheromones, Max."
--Threnody

Worked!"Well, Max, here we go halfway across the planet to face destinies we don't even understand. (pause) You know, we may all be killed there. (pause) This is a pass, in case you were wondering."
--Threnody, to Evil Max.

No such luck"Is this body married too?"
--Trissia, to Luthien upon his reincarnation

No such luck"We're allowed to bring dates to the wedding, right?"
--Endicott, to Praxis

Worked!"I'll see that a tent is prepared--"
"Is there room in your tent?"
"In my tent?"
"Just for me."
--Tila, to Kieran in the alternate universe

No such luck"Perhaps you have a change of clothes in your bag, Jack?"
"I, uh, don't think so..."
"Good."
--Valende, to Jack

No such luck"You ever hear of saddle smile?"
--Asinus the talking donkey, to Khyrisse

No such luck"This donkey tongue ain't just for show, chickie-baby."
--Asinus to Khyrisse

Took more persuading..."Well, what are you waiting for, man? Let's go see if they need someone to scrub their backs!"
--Ebreth to Vas, re Khyrisse and Ariath

Worked!"The Cynystran army isn't here now."
--Ebreth to Khyrisse

Worked!"Shut up and kiss me."
--Ariath to Vas

No such luck"Hey, lolly, come give us a little mouth-to-mouth, why don't you."
--Asinus to Khyrisse

No such luck"Hey, chickie, you look like your nerves could use some soothing. Have you noticed I'm not wearing any pants?"
--Asinus to Khyrisse

Worked!"You know, Asinus, I think I would like some long, hard donkey--"
--Ailonwy the demon, to Asinus

No such luck"Getting a woman into the sack is a lot like disemboweling an ogre."
--Kerouac

No such luck"Did Kerouac already ask you if you wanted to fuck?"
--Kerouac to Ember

No such luck"Does this mean that fucking is out?"
--Kerouac to an angry Valende

No such luck"Is that dress illusory?"
"You are welcome to try and disbelieve it, monsieur."
--Vas and Ember

Worked!"Why don't you come up to my room tonight and I'll teach you some Elvish?"
--Val to Rani

No such luck"Rani, Rani, young and sweet. Your little toes, your little feet."
--Marty Hu's love poems

No such luck"Marty, I'm a lesbian. That means I like women."
"I like women too! We have something in common!"
--Marty and Rani

No such luck"You, me, a bottle of chianti, this half-flayed rabbit wriggling around in our orifices..."
--Nox to Vas

No such luck"Iím not a virgin... Iíve had sex lots of times. Iím pretty good, I think."
--Kingfisher to Marty

Worked!"You like me or NOT, Jack?"
--Aithne to Jack

No such luck"It's been two thousand years, lass. Aren't you curious at all?"
--Kieran, to Kyria

Male-Female Divider

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