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'Does the moon look bigger to you tonight?'

The Book of Ataniel

Trading Places



�Stand back.� Ebreth the boar took a running start at the door and smashed it open in an oddly cathartic splintering of wood. The lock mechanism fell to the ground and spun there, once. �I never knew pigs had such strong necks before,� he mused, hopping up on his hind legs to inspect his tusks in the hall mirror. �Learn something new every day, I guess. This, ah, this spell does wear off on its own eventually, right?�

�You�re asking me?�

�Jack,� sighed an older man, rubbing his temples as he stepped through the broken door and into the hallway. �You have no idea how much trouble you just got me into in there, do you?�

�Uh...� Jack Yearlate balked a little and looked to Ebreth, who looked equally confused, insofar as a pig could look confused. �I�m sorry, do I, uh... know you?�

�Jeez, kid, it�s your uncle Asinus! I wasn�t born a donkey, ya know.�

�I, have amnesia,� Jack apologized.

�Asinus?� said the pig.

�You had better not be one of my old sidekicks from that flarkin� barnyard revolt of �89,� Asinus grumbled.

�No,� he said. �No, it�s Ebreth Tor. What are you doing here?�

�Looking for you two, obv--� Asinus stopped. �You have got to be flarkin� kidding me.�

�I�m afraid not,� said the pig. �I can see how this gets old after a while.�

�Let me guess. You found the impression of Arturian.�

�No, Aithne did it. You�re all here, aren�t you?�

�Hell yeah,� said Asinus. �What got into Witchy Spice?�

�She thought we were doppelgangers. Long story.�

�Well, it�s something of an improvement, anyway.� Asinus grinned, and switched the pig on the side with his bow. �Come on, you two, let�s gather the troops and get out of here before my destiny figures out where I went.�

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'Does the moon look bigger to you tonight?'

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